I'm Not Happy

This one was tough to write I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not All the negativity is entering my thoughts Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not Thought I'd be your Romeo; but then I missed the shot It's a twisted plot, reminiscing was a kid that's shy Every day I'd hit you up with a different pick up line Hoping one day I could make you mine, maybe change your mind So I opened up my heart and then I put it on the line, yeah But I guess it wasn't meant to be, you and me Romeo and Juliet became a tragedy It's so sad to see, now I gotta move on Graduating, relocating to a place maybe Tucson Got my boots on, journey feeling too long Putting all our memories into a Nike shoebox Maybe when I get there I will make another new song Maybe I'll admit that I was scared your love was too strong Maybe you were right, and maybe I was wrong And maybe I still love you and was happy all along cause I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not All the negativity is entering my thoughts Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I'm not really feeling good, stomach in a knot Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got What's wrong with you Jesse Why's everything gotta be so hard I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not God gave me a lot but a lot I have lost Guess the Lord giveth, and He taketh away Well now I'm down on my knees cause He making me pray And I can't stomach all the pain, instead I'm pushing You away I tried so hard to run away, but feel like I'm running in place And I don't deserve Your grace, naw I don't deserve it You sent me a message, I want You to know I heard it And even though I'm hurting I'm still giving You my best That's why I have Your verses on my back and on my chest I try to open up; but still I struggle to connect My heart I'm holding up; I just want You to accept That I don't know how to live, so what should I say now? Want it black or white, I never wanted it greyed out Looking up to You, can You show me the way now Show me the way now, show me the way out cause I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not All the negativity is entering my thoughts Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I'm not really feeling good, stomach in a knot Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got There's a verse I want you all to hear It's the one I have on my chest Revelation 21:4 Said He'll wipe away the tears and that death will be no more And He'll claim all of our sorrow, and our crying and our pain For the former things have passed cause He took it all away And even when I'm struggling to figure out my place In a world full of serpents who will try to test my faith I am yearning for discernment when I bow my head to pray And I'm searching for Your loving even when I lose my way cause I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not All the negativity is entering my thoughts Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I'm not really feeling good, stomach in a knot Yeah, I should be happy but I'm not, I'm not I should thank God for the things that I've got