Breakthrough

I been working on Emotional maturity Financial security Still got time to murder beats You probably never heard of me Had to get ahead of this depression I been hurdling Had to find some clarity this therapy like Claritin I been living my life on my own terms Focused on myself and on the long term I'm done giving love without no loan terms Kept my heart too open it's a gift but a lonely curse yeah Maybe there's love for me somewhere out there in the multiverse Variations of past lovers that's deserve to get traversed But these days I put myself first Used to sip on casual flings just to quench the thirst Now I got a little drive like a chauffeur Saw a therapist he helped me find a road to closure Building up my credit little steps since I been sober Still dealing with stress but getting better with composure Used to get defensive over criticism Used to just deflect the confrontation into cynicism I could not accept the confirmation of how I was living Stuck feeling insecure without the proper motivation Witnessing success of all my peers while I was stagnant Codependent to all of my exes like an addict Put the blame on them when they left cuz they couldn't stand it Took some time to self reflect to finally understand shit I was sleeping in the bed I made Insecurities engrained since I was in the 7th grade Subconsciously I took the blame the day my father walked away A lot more changed on that adoption day than just a name It turned me to a walking ticking time bomb Tripping off the spice opened up my mind's blind spot Repressed depression took possession over my thoughts Everyday emotions were on shuffle like an iPod 10 years a struggle looking back like where's the time gone 10 years in limbo I felt like it's all just time lost 5 years sober guess I'm not as bad as I thought Almost jumped ship and drank Jack when she left me Rose above I still ain't drank jack since I went clean Right now I'm the best me, money I'm investing Counting all my blessings, continue progressing Finally addressing subconscious oppression This shit like a chess game and I'm playing in the end game I been getting money yeah I'm all about my check, mate