I’m Not Okay

I'm not okay I'm not okay, I'm not okay I'm not okay, I'm not okay I'm not okay, I'm not okay, I'm not okay Tattooed your name on my face for heavens sake I don't know if I can keep up the pace I'm running late But maybe if I leave this life now I won't have to wait All these days, all of these weeks, all of these years Running from feelings for you Fighting back these tears Alexis dear, I'm waiting here I'm the one it should be clear I'm not the one that you should fear I'm the one that you should be with I'm just waiting for you to see it You're the only one I feel complete with I know you're keeping secrets About how he fucking treats you I know he fucking beats you The baby is the only reason he don't leave you Alexis girl I need you Cuz without you life just don't have no purpose The longer we're apart the more time were just gonna spend hurting Talking to you still makes me nervous I still get the butterflies You know I'm nothing like those other guys Girl I'm one of a kind Had a glow up since you left bitch I turned into a dime These bitches think I'm fine I don't care if you don't look the same Cuz the love I have is real and not a single thing has changed Except for the way that I act and the way I behave Didn't even hesitate to go and tat your name on my face It's no mistake I bet when you heard about it you were shook Like every time I slide into your inbox on the 'Book Can never wife a bitch now because of how I look I've felt empty on the inside ever since my heart got took But really you can keep it I don't really need it I don't really need it Your name is on my forehead now girls don't want me when they see it I heard you ain't believe it I heard you ain't believe it Girl I told you I'm dedicated You're the only girl I'll ever love and for real I fucking hate it I miss the sound of your voice Sometimes I fucking crave it Can't love no bitch but you I can't find no replacement So I yatted your name up on my face and just embraced it I miss getting wasted it was easier to not think about you When I was getting fucked up it was easier to be without you I'll never fucking doubt you Knew you were the one before we even talked Now I'm lost, out here breaking laws Out here breaking laws My heart wasn't worth the cost My heart wasn't worth the cost Bitch Im fucking sauced Trying to drown out my emotions Cuz without you I'm not floating Bitch I'm drowning grab the bottle and then I down it Lost my heart and never fucking found it Alexis I can't take this Can we please try to save it This love we can't erase it I knew you fucking felt it when we talked up on the phone Knew you fucking felt it when we talked up on the phone Im all alone cuz now I can't pull any hoes Because I tatted your name up on my dome My heart is froze I'm not the one you chose so my heart is broke You already know Bitch I need you You know that I won't beat you I think you'll be surprised how the new me finna treat you Girl I won't leave you never would and never fucking will I said fuck the pills Now I like to get close to death cuz it's a thrill I have a void to fill cuz without you I'm just empty I know you that you fucking miss me Know that you're better off with me I'm getting tipsy cuz when I'm drunk I typically don't give a fuck This shits a bust cuz you're never gonna come back A life with you I want that but you don't I can't confront that Fuck that so I'm getting drunk off this liquor If I kill myself now maybe I'll be with you quicker Maybe I'll be with you quicker I'm not okay, I'm not okay, I'm not okay Tattooed your name on my face for heavens sake I don't know if I can keep up the pace I'm running late But maybe if I leave this life now I won't have to wait All these days, all of these weeks, all of these years Running from feelings for you Fighting back these tears Alexis dear, I'm waiting here I'm the one it should be clear I'm not the one that you should fear I'm the one that you should be with I'm just waiting for you to see it You're the only one I feel complete with I know you're keeping secrets About how he fucking treats you I know he fucking beats you The baby is the only reason he don't leave you Alexis girl I need you Cuz without you life just don't have no purpose The longer we're apart the more time were just gonna spend hurting Talking to you still makes me nervous I still get the butterflies You know I'm nothing like those other guys Girl I'm one of a kind Had a glow up since you left bitch I turned into a dime These bitches think I'm fine I don't care if you don't look the same Cuz the love I have is real and not a single thing has changed