Mowing lawns, saving up for a guitar
When I was fifteen, and long and lean
And just like that grass, boy, I was green
Delivering roses in Washington D.C.
Going off to college, so I had to save up
But delivering roses really sucks
Sweating all summer in a slimy tux
But at least I made a couple bucks
Freshman in college, I was delivering pizza
But to deliver one pie, half an hour round trip
And college kids, man, they don't tip
And so I quit
It was their loss
'Cos I was the only driver not stealing from the boss
Siphoning gas from students' cars
Metropolitan Museum at the telephone switchboard
When a caller would ask for Phillip de Montebello
I'd transfer to my apartment, where an unsespecting fellow
My roommate Stuart, who was sound asleep
Would answer the phone when he heard the beep
And pretty quickly they'd realise that he wasn't Phillip
Information counter at the Cloiser's Museum
And one day, Billy Joel walks in
I take a long, long look at him
A dignified old music man
That's when I devised my plan
That little plan has bought me here
Where the spotlights shine and the people all cheer
And the pretty girls flock from far and near
To touch my hand, and hear my songs
And buy my t-shirts, and sing along
God damn, this sure beats mowing lawns
