Conglomeration (Or: The Grand Pathetic Suite)

Uproarious! Rumpus! Uproarious! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody bloody racket and rumpus! Bloody racket! Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Blood, bloody, bloody rack, bloody racket Until the end is nigh, until the piggies fly Until the boom and quake and mushroom in the sky For no particular reward I'll prepare a sarcastic noose and cord And even as you dangle I will make you feel ignored I'll find you Just to turn my back upon your silly stare! Yeah, I'll find you And make every effort to make you aware How much I don't care! Oh, you have been misled! Don't give a toss if you're alive or dead Because I need you like I need a bullet through my head How ineptly you chide! A caustic ball of bile but you bowl it wide You wouldn't hit an ass's arse with a banjo if you tried! I'll find you Just to turn my back upon your silly stare! Oh, I'll find you And make every effort to make you aware How much I don't care at all You tell the days apart By the different tastes of sick You lie awake in bed And watch the dust grow thick A broken man, spineless to the end A broken man, he will never love again You tell the days apart By the spiders on your plate Of something canned and cold You can't remember what you ate A broken man, pathetic to the bone A broken man, but he chose to be alone I've nothing left to say But I say it anyway Oh, life is tough When you're me I've nothing left to say But I say it anyway Oh, life is tough When you're me Think you can have it all your way? Think you can have it all your way? Think you're some kind of queen? Well, I say Saucy Tiara Woman! Saucy Tiara Woman! Saucy Tiara Woman! (Saucy Tiara Woman!) For the umpteenth bottle open like a flesh wound For the ice in humorous shapes and hues I feel all the more marooned When life has done its very worst to shock me Even my ice cubes seem to mock me, singing "Just like your life, we're cold and fruit shaped! We let you see what you most despise Your reflection in another pear of ice!" "Your life's like us, it's cold and fruit shaped! It's like a soppy film, just like the one in which we're draped! Finding buoyancy in drink of vice We are your parody in ice cube guise! We let you see what you most despise Your reflection in another pear of ice!" Now, I can tell a rotten sort And treat her to a practiced snort A charm? A hex? A jinx? Tut-tut! I sigh and shrug and covet your coven not! One foul gossip (the count's precise) Per persnicketily painted petty pout! Riddled with riddles Lousy with lies The blabber's the blubber To insulate us out! Now I'm aware! Now I prepare! I'll give you naught but snort and sneer! The omens are there! The omens are clear! Klaxons wail now, can't you hear? Con-girl omen ratio 1! Now, I won't be enticed again Well, once or twice perchance, but then I'll play the puppet on wobbly knees But I can quit whenever I bloody well please! Now I'm aware! Now I prepare! I'll give you naught but snort and sneer! The omens are there! The omens are clear! Klaxons wail now, can't you hear? Con-girl omen ratio 1! Uproarious! I'll find you Just to turn my back upon your silly stare! Oh, I'll find you And make every effort to make you aware How much I don't care at all (Saucy Tiara Woman!) Your life's like us, it's cold and fruit shaped! (Saucy Tiara Woman!) It's like a soppy film, just like the one in which we're draped! (Saucy Tiara Woman!) (Finding buoyancy in drink of vice) A broken man (We are your parody in ice cube guise!) Spineless to the end (Saucy Tiara Woman!) (We let you see what you most despise) A broken man Life is tough When you're me! I'll find you Just to turn my back upon your silly stare! Oh, I'll find you And make every effort to make you aware How much I don't care at all