Town Called Ugley

Left in plenty of time and thank God we did The clock kept screaming the time and the tires skid Turn left, 'bout a half hour later We were right back where we began When we started this trip It wasn't just my mood that was going down hill It even felt we were being pursued when the car stood still Turn right, the Tom-Tom said I wanna chuck it right out of the car And leave it for dead I swear we drove right past the old kings head 25 times or more The wipers stopped and Catherine said "I can't take this any more" So Lizzy jumped out and took the wheel She coulda took us to the moon and back By the time that we got out and slammed the door In a town called UGLEY Swerved more than a couple times for a black alpaca Delayed in every kind of way so time was a factor Only made worse by a broken down tractor Turn round and slam on the brakes Or we will drive straight down the road to find our next mistake I swear we drove right past the Old Kings Head 25 times or more The wipers stopped and Catherine said "I can't take this any more" So Lizzy jumped out and took the wheel She could of took us to the moon and back By the time that we got out and slammed the door In a town called UGLEY So after driving right past the Old Kings Head 55 times or more The tire's flat and the battery's dead it doesn't matter any more We survived this drive to tell the tale What the hell did we come here for We couldn't wait to get out and finally slam the door On a town That bloody town It's a cotton-picking town called UGLEY