Plastic Jesus

I don't care if it rains or freezes Long as I got my plastic Jesus Ridin' on the dashboard of my car Through my trials and tribulations And my travels through the nation With my plastic Jesus I'll go far Ridin' down the thoroughfare With a nose up in the air A wreck may be ahead but he don't mind Trouble comin' he don't seek He just keeps his eye on me And any other thing that lies behind With my plastic Jesus Goodbye and I'll go far I sit with my plastic Jesus Sitting on the dashboard of my car When I'm in a traffic jam He don't care if I say damn I can let all my curses roll 'Cause Jesus plastico doesn't hear 'Cause he has a plastic ear The man who invented plastic saved my soul With my plastic Jesus I said goodbye and I'll go far I sit with my plastic Jesus Sitting on the dashboard of my car, oh yeah And if I weave around at night Policemen think I'm very tired They never find my bottle though they ask 'Cause plastic Jesus shelters me For his head comes off, you see He's hollow and I use him like a flask Save me I don't care if it's dark or scary Long as I got magnetic Mary Ridin' on the dashboard of my car I feel that I'm protected amply I've got the love of the whole damn family Ridin' on the dashboard of my car With my plastic Jesus I said goodbye and I'll go far And I sit with my plastic Jesus I said we're sitting on the dashboard of my car, oh-oh I sit with my plastic Jesus (when I'm goin' fornicatin' I've got my ceramic Satan) Help me Jesus, help me Jesus (sittin' on the dashboard of my car) With my plastic Jesus (women know I'm on the level thanks to the wide-eyed stoneware devil) Sneerin' from the dashboard of my car