It Doesn't Get Better Than This

[Wilbur:] [Spoken-] "Tracy, my little petunia, even I used to get discouraged about the future. Luckily, I had a Wonderful family to turn to." When I was a tot not much older than three, My father would sit me on his one good knee. He hacked and he coughed from those three packs a day, But he still found the lung-power to say: "Ohhh, the... future looks dark, may be troubles ahead. You at least have tomorrow but I may be dead." Then he yelled from the can taking his final piss: "Kid! it doesn't get better than this!" [Wilbur:] [Spoken-] "Feel better, Tracy?" [Tracy:] [Spoken-] "Um... Sorta..." [Wilbur:] [Spoken-] "Alright, then, listen to this!" My mother loved dope, and tobacco she'd chew. Each morning at breakfast she'd knock back a few. She walked me to school with her eyes shiny red; I can still smell her breath as she said: "Ohhh, the... future looks bright, Wilbur, don't make a fuss." Then she stepped off the curb, and got hit by a bus. So, don't wait for the future. It's all hit or miss. Kid, it doesn't get better than this. Oh, No! Don't count your troubles. Things may take a turn for the worse. Life keeps sticking you up, till' they're picking you up in a hearse. Oh, Nurse! My uncle wore raincoats though it never rained. He showed off the lining, till' someone complained. When he got arrested, he said: "What the hell!" And he wrote me this note from his cell: "Ohhh, the... future looked grim when the judge gave me life, But I've hung up my raincoat 'cause I found a wife. Yes, Herman and I live in pure wedded bliss. Kid, it doesn't get better than this." Sooo, your... future looks bleak and you can't find your smile. Baby, life's just a joke, why not laugh for a while? Now, how 'bout a hug? Give your old man a kiss! [Tracy:] [Spoken-] "Daddy..." 'Cause it doesn't get better than this. No, it doesn't... get better... than this...