Daddy

'(Akiva Schaffer)' Papa did you see me hit a home run last night? I lit the stadium on fire, I was Oakland's pride Daddy, did you see me? Look what I can do, yeah Daddy, do you hear me crying? (Crying) Daddy, can you see I'm dying? (Dying) Oh, Dad Tell 'em, José (Andy Samberg) Ever since little league Middle school, middle league Always played technically Perfect like a symphony Little me got much bigger, faster, stronger, Dad Hit it so long, but you always want it longer, Dad But therapy's for losers Little boy, therapy's for losers (Akiva Schaffer & "Andy Samberg") Buy all my steroids in bulk ("Costco") Wanna get big as The Hulk ("Hogan") Stronger than Wolverine teeth ("Logan") Answer to 'Where's the beef?' ("Slogan") "First, I put on my jock Then both of my socks Parachute Hammer pants and my Reeboks Hot tub inside a limousine at Chuck E. Cheese Dad, look at me" (Jorma Taccone, "Andy Samberg") José, heard you went on a pretty hot date The other night. Care to tell us about it? "Hey, come on. You guys know I don't kiss and tell" (Akiva Shaffer, "Andy Samberg") "Oh, I went on a date with Madonna She said that she wanted Cuban babies She seemed like a smart business lady But I didn't find her physically attractive" I went on a date with my mama Took her out for all-you-can-eat shrimp She said she was proud of her baby (That's me) So, I guess we both had a wild week "Therapy's for losers, Dad said Therapy's for losers" (Akiva Shaffer, "Andy Samberg", "'Both"') "Keep your mouth shut" No snitchin' "About the steroids" No snitchin' "About the steroids" About the steroids "'About the steroids About the steroids"' Don't fuck up a good thing while you got it