Dentist!

When I was younger, just a bad little kid My momma noticed funny things I did Like shootin' puppies with a B B gun I'd poison guppies, and when I was done I'd find a pussy cat and bash in its head That's when my momma said What did she say? She said "My boy, I think someday You'll find a way to make your natural tendencies pay" You'll be a dentist (You'll be a dentist) You have a talent for causing things pain (Pain) Son, be a dentist (Son, be a dentist) People will pay you to be inhumane (Inhumane) Your temperament's wrong for the priesthood And teaching would suit you still less Son, be a dentist you'll be a success Here he is girls, the leader of the plaque Watch him suck up that gas, oh my God He's a dentist and he'll never ever be any good Who wants their teeth done by the Marquis De Sade? Oh, that hurts, wait, I'm not numb Ehh, shut up, open wide, here I come I am your dentist (Goodness gracious) And I enjoy the career that I picked (You love it) I am your dentist (That's what you're best at) And I get off on the pain I inflict (You really love it) When I start extracting those molars You girls will start screaming like holly rollers (Dentist) And though it may 'cause my patients distress (Distress) Somewhere, in heaven above me I know, I know that my momma's proud of me 'Cause I'm a dentist and a success Say aah (Ahh) Say aah (Ahh) Say ahh (Ahh) Now spit