what's left unsaid says it all

Catching up 'cause she told me we can speak now I keep my lights on when I sleep now I keep my phone on when you go out 'Cause when I fall asleep you're the one I dream 'bout Look I don't need to sleep anymore, I feel empty Lie awake and I wonder, do you still miss me? Rain fall in, my conscious clouding my memories I haven't eaten in days, shit is depressing I know we talked about moving on and forgetting My home screen is still you, something won't let me Sometimes I have good days then it hits me The best part about me is better not with me I've been thinking 'bout these feelings Like when you say you love me, did you even mean it? I know that you don't need me, wish you see it The only time I see you now is when I'm dreaming And you still my forever, but I know I'll never be enough Gave me all these chances, but I always seem to fuck it up I just wanna hear everything about your day I just wanna pretend just for a second you feel the same I just wanna wake up to 4 a.m. texts from you like "Hey, I just wanna let you know That I love you so much and I got home safe" Now it all feels fake Every time that you would lie to me and you would cry to me And I would tell you that no matter what it's all okay I guess love brings hate I guess people do change I guess feelings must fade I guess I got, fuck I guess I gotta be mindful that I'll see most with my eyes closed And I'll sit with all the words I wish I could unsay, yeah Catching up 'cause she told me we can speak now I keep my lights on when I sleep now I keep my phone on when you go out 'Cause when I fall asleep you're the one I dream 'bout Yeah, you tell me that you love me but your heart is rather cold Catching sparks from all the fireworks, I'll melt to fit your mold But you're freezing in the summer, we ain't close to either pole But the distance feels immense between the fibers in my soul So I'll travel down the coast in search of love or something close Gotta make you slip discreetly in the pocket of my coat What a travesty of character like kerosene to stone Guess the heat left me perspiring designed to be alone I'll be questioning your motives when you reach me on the phone Like are you there with anybody else or are you on your own? Playing cautious with the chords in case They're wrapped around my throat Try regurgitating all this shit I wish I never wrote But separate motives that you hated, now you know If a boat's over capacity then does it sink or float? I've been treading through the water Thinking 'bout the times you spoke My alarm went off this morning but alas, I never woke Catching up 'cause she told me we can speak now I keep my lights on when I sleep now I keep my phone on when you go out 'Cause when I fall asleep you're the one I dream 'bout Brought a black Nikon to the beach house Pull my fleece out when I feel the breeze out Used to freak, now you're too busy to go out Throw my dreams out, all I do is sleep now