Makin' Whoopee

Every time I hear that march from Lohengrin I am always on the outside lookin' in Maybe, that is why I see the funny side When I see somebody's brother take a bride Weddings make a lot of people sad But if you're not the groom, they're not so bad Another bride, another June Another sunny honeymoon Another season, another reason For makin' whoopee A lot of shoes, a lot of rice The groom is nervous He answers twice It's really killin', that he's so willin' to make whoopee Picture a little love nest Down where the roses cling Picture that same sweet love nest Think, what a year can bring He's washing dishes and baby clothes He's so ambitious, he even sews, But don't forget folks, that's what you get folks For makin' whoopee Another year, or maybe less What's this I hear, oh, can't you guess? She feels neglected and he's suspected, Of makin' whoopee She sits alone 'most every night He doesn't phone, he's doesn't write, He says, he's busy, but she says, is he? He's makin' whoopee He doesn't make much money Only five hundred thousand per, Some judge who thinks he's funny Says, you pay six to her He says, "Now judge, suppose I fail?" Judge says, "Bud, right into jail" You better keep her, You'll found it's cheaper Than makin' whoopee