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Lyrics
Some friends and I
In a public house
Were playing dominos one night
Into the room the barman came
His face all chalky white
"What's up?" says Brown
"Have you seen a ghost?
Have you seen your Aunt Mariah?"
"Oh me Aunt Mariah be buggered!" said he
"The bloody pub's on fire!"
"On fire!" says Brown
"What a bit of luck
Everybody follow me
Down to the cellar, if the fire's not there
We'll have a rare old spree!"
So we all went down after good old Brown
Booze we could not miss
And we weren't there 5 minutes or more
'Til we were all half pissed
And there was Brown, upside down
Lickin' up the whiskey off the floor
"Booze! Booze!" the firemen cried
As they came knockin' at the door
Don't let them in till it's all mopped up
Somebody shouted "MacIntyre" (MacIntyre!)
And we all got blue blind
Paralytic drunk
When the Old Dun Cow caught fire
Then Smith went over
To the port wine tub
Gave it a few hard knocks
Started takin' off his pantaloons
Likewise his shoes and socks
"Hold on!" Says Brown
"We can't have that!
You can't do that in here!
Don't go washin' your trotters
In the port wine tub
When we've got all this Lite beer"
And there was Brown, upside down
Lickin' up the whiskey off the floor
"Booze! Booze!" the firemen cried
As they came knockin' at the door
Don't let them in till it's all mopped up
Somebody shouted "MacIntyre" (MacIntyre!)
And we all got blue blind
Paralytic drunk
When the Old Dun Cow caught fire
Just then there came an awful crash
Half the bloody roof gave way
We were drowned in the fireman's hose
Still, we were going to stay
So we got some tacks
And our old wet slacks
And nailed ourselves inside
And we sat there swallyin'
Pints of stout
Till we were bleary-eyed!
And there was Brown, upside down
Lickin' up the whiskey off the floor
"Booze! Booze!" the firemen cried
As they came knockin' at the door
Don't let them in till it's all mopped up
Somebody shouted "MacIntyre" (MacIntyre!)
And we all got blue blind
Paralytic drunk
When the Old Dun Cow caught fire
Writer(s): David Hyde, Barry Hyde, Ross Millard, David Craig
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