Diary (Anxiety)

Kudala ngiku- Kudala ngikulindiwe Kudala ngikulindiwe Kudala ngikulindiwe sithandwa sam' Sundishiya ndingodwa Kudala ngikulindiwe sithandwa sam' My moments of clarity are far and Few between, dear diary, anxiety goes I can't open up to anybody They don't know how loud the silence is, reality Dear diary, I'm losing my religion, my batteries Dear diary, I'm getting real close That's why I'm talking to you and nobody else, dear diary (Kudala ngikulindiwe) (Kudala ngiku-) Lights are on but nobody's home (Sundishiya ndingodwa) (Kudala ngiku) Okay, I cannot live here, I cannot sit still I cannot rebuild, promises unfulfilled here I don't want to die 'cause if I go silent Who gon' feed all my children? Nothing feels real no more How do I fill this hole in my spirit? I cannot hear clichés no more Living my low life What did you score me? I was on top of your pyramid, that's when the pastor told me He cannot program consequences, decisions I be like "I'm a good Christian" Get big guap at the robots Slide down, electric windows Everyday I walk in your path How you gon' take two weeks of the best days of my life? That's stealing, shee Test my faith then test my say Personal? That's business I cannot hide in my crib forever Tried to tie my hands behind my back so I can't feed familia I'm gon' do when the pool is greener Tighten my button and mean mug This side it's the right time to clean up Mamacita, since you left me? All of this cash is petty How can I wear my Rolex and my Giuseppe? How can I flex so empty? Do you love or regret me? Kudhala My moments of clarity are far and Few between, Dear Diary, anxiety goes I can't open up to anybody They don't know how loud the silence is, reality Dear Diary, I'm losing my religion, my batteries Dear Diary, I'm getting real close That's why I'm talking to you and nobody else, Dear Diary (Kudala ngikulindiwe) (Kudala ngiku-) Lights are on but nobody's home (Sundishiya ndingodwa) (Kudala ngiku) Okay, I cannot feel no pain Nothing come close to the way I feel When I go back in my memory bank and I see that frame That shit burned my brain forever That's where my whole life changed in the space of 30 seconds Signed the papers Character assassination I cannot put my wife to shame, I pray she rests in perfection Okay, I get it Need someone to blame, you sent flames in my direction But there's no time machine to rewind us backwards She's gone We in the present I gave her everything that I had How you gon' cap and not even make one phone call to my mom or my dad After we put the sand on the casket? That shit is wack, passive aggressive Never mind Bheki Cele, he wasn't even on the program I wrote a speech then took my seat And opened that thing, my name was nowhere, imagine It's okay, I still got that thing wrapped up in plastic Classic One day My moments of clarity are far and Few between, Dear Diary, anxiety goes I can't open up to anybody They don't know how loud the silence is, reality Dear Diary, I'm losing my religion, my batteries low Dear Diary, I'm getting real close That's why I'm talking to you and nobody else, Dear Diary (Kudala ngikulindiwe) (Kudala ngikulindiwe) Lights are on but nobody's home (Sundishiya ndingodwa) (Kudala ngiku)