Miracle: Pt. 3

Oh, my undercarriage doesn't feel quite normal My skin looks just revolting in this foul, fluorescent light And this gown is nothing like the semi-formal Semi-Spanish gown I should be wearing in the semi-finals tonight! I should be dancing the Tarentella Qui mon fella Italiano Not dressed in hospital cotton With an owchie . . . front bottom And this Miracle! Horrible Miracle! Smelly little The most beautiful miracle I have ever seen! I can't find his frank 'n' beans! Ev-er-y life is unbelievably unlikely My mummy says I'm a miracle The chances of existence almost infinitely small My daddy says I'm his special little guy The most common thing in life is life – Hup, two, four, free! And yet, every single life Every new life Is a miracle! Miracle! Miracle! My mummy says I'm a miracle One look at my face and it's plain to see Ever since the day doc chopped the umbilical cord It's been clear there's no peer for a miracle like me My mummy says I'm a miracle That I'm as tiny and as shiny as a mirror ball You can be all cynical But it's a truth empirical There's never been a miracle, a miracle, a miracle as . . My mummy says I'm a lousy little worm My daddy says I'm a bore My mummy says I'm a jumped-up little germ That kids like me should be against the law My daddy says I should learn to shut my pie-hole No one like a smart-mouthed girl like me Mum says I'm a good case for population control Dad says I should watch more TV