Pretty Ugly

I look, pr-pretty ugly I look, nice and disgusting I look, g-good for nothing I don't like the way I'm looking I look, pr-pretty ugly I look, nice and disgusting I look, g-good for nothing I don't like the way I treat myself I don't see the way you see me I ain't even aware of my own reality I'm looking in the mirror, I rarely feel pretty To busy giving time to negativity Distorted image of my body, I probably Never gonna find somebody that want for real How the fuck I sposed to heal? I don't know how to deal With the fact I hate the way I look I ain't sposed to feel this ill I held it till it spill over My mother on the first flight when death came closer Sitting in the hospital, doctors looking at me Asking if I see the future, well not really Damn, cause that's hard to accept When you making peace with never taking another breath When your self image is a disgusting silhouette Every compliment you get becomes a threat I look, pr-pretty ugly I look, nice and disgusting I look, g-good for nothing I don't like the way I'm looking I look, pr-pretty ugly I look, nice and disgusting I look, g-good for nothing I don't like the way I treat myself, myself I know it's not too good for my health, my health Cause I don't like the way it's feeling It's hard if we don't ever talk about it That why I had to right this song about it Feeling like a freak, is it only me? No other man talk about it, so it must be But fuck gender, we all human I'm floating on this spectrum feeling so confused and I don't wanna keep this shit to myself I know I'm not the only man who hated himself We don't talk about it, we just kill ourselves Or take it out on women, cause we don't get the help But be honest, I swear this shit is toxic Masculinity so fragile we hiding in the closet, ironic And it's hard to accept When your genders entrenched in a negative effect When your self image is a disgusting silhouette Every single thought we don't regret becomes a threat I look, pr-pretty ugly I look, nice and disgusting I look, g-good for nothing I don't like the way I'm looking I look, pr-pretty ugly I look, nice and disgusting I look, g-good for nothing I don't like the way I treat myself, myself I know it's not too good for my health, my health Cause I don't like the way I treat myself, myself I know it's not too good for my health, my health Cause I don't like the way it's feeling Oh no, oh no, oh no Oh no, oh no, oh no I don't like the way I treat myself, myself I know it's not too good for my health, my health Cause I don't like the way I treat myself, myself I know it's not too good for my health, my health Cause I don't like the way I treat myself, myself I know it's not too good for my health, my health Cause I don't like the way it's feeling