The Gift & the Curse (feat. Trips)

I got too much on my mind, i gotta let it out I'm verbally rapping these words into to circles And sacrifice everything, jumping the hurdles A menace to most and a ghost to the rest but i Slaughter the mic and i keep the core bleeding I'm underground shaking the earth like a tremor All of these words in my head i remember They pour on the pages and pages and pictures Of people i love and i hate and some bitches Still i keep rapping and rhyming the words And i'm thinking so much and it feels like a curse Write another book then i feel a little better Sitting by the fire with my dog like a storyteller Writers block is more than development hell Lost and mad til break the spell So i can break the wall and flow the river Play the song back and let it live forever It's more than a like and a share when they listen More than a mission, more like i'm fishing More than some fiction where i can kill a victim More than addiction, more than a vision The worlds so fucked and I'm always deep thinking Got another bottle than I just keep drinking Upside down to the bottom of the world I'm a tunnel runner you ain't gonna understand ahh! The night gets so dark and so dull and i'm dead But voices are talking so loud in my head Spit out the blood on the beat in this verse And the freedom you feel is so good but its worse I keep on complaining like this is a burden But when it is quiet i feel like i'm hurting Born to entertain like a clown in the circus I got my purpose don't feel so worthless! I got too much on my mind, I gotta let it out My head is a mess Low on my breath Anxiety grippin my chest, Sobriety I'm part of society now Still these hands keep pulling me down Into the depths Surrounded by flames Stress as a best friend No closer to sane When does it end Im grounded Since i waa founded, 88 Never seeing no change Yall think i can get up, Go pick the pen up And I'll be fine, Its a set up Got the grind, But these thoughts In my mind, "Won't let up" Show me a sign, "Im fed up" Feel like i'm drowning heavy like mountains Man its astounding i can just push through Ain't quit Though Heres a quick show To prove Im still the one In front of two I'm more than twisted Born as gifted, But the curse is worse Make me mourn existence Should be tour livin, with the lore im givin But im stuck no luck with this poor admission Got these fans livid, Dms fillin "Trips you were born to kill it Can we at least get a verse A Song or a hello Some words to show that you're not missin" Well here it is, The virus shit Supplied by nights of Indecisiveness Its hard to get when your mind fights And you don't know what enlightened is Im still ill though Iv strapped on a covid dose Explode on a beat, like im owed the dough You'll get over thrown Its still r.i.p to my older foes, yeah