I'm trapped!
I have been put into a trick bag
I've been lumbered!
I've been L-U-M-B-E-R-E-D, lumbered
And I can't pretend I find it any fun
I'm too young to be a father
There are lots of things I'd rather be
And trust me, being lumbered isn't one
When I ought to be completely unencumbered
I've been forced to buy a ring and say "Amen"
Amen
I've been L-U-M-B-E-R-E-D, lumbered
But I'm never gonna get lumbered again
I've been L-U-M-B-E-R-E-D, lumbered
And I gotta say, I'm feeling pretty choked
Bang! Go all my lovely visions
I've been forced to make decisions
Wish I had a dime for every pack I've smoked
When I think of all the chicks with whom I've slumbered
Now I'll only ever see them now and then
(On the weekends, and whenever the wife's not around)
Smartass
I've been L-U-M-B-E-R-E-D, lumbered
But I'm never gonna get lumbered again!
If I ever get my hands upon the idiot who wrote
"Into every life a little rain must fall"
I shall take his book of wisdom
And I'll shove it up his throat
Little rain, my ass
I seem to get it all
I know you've heard it before
And I'm going to say it again
There is one thing fixed dead center in my mind
I've been L-U-M-B-E-R-E-D, lumbered
It's enough to drive a fella M-A-D
I am scarcely past my childhood
I still play the games a child would
I'm still playing moms and dads, as you can see
When I think of all the chicks with whom I've rhumba'ed
For the wedding march, I'm lumbered with a hen
(Quack, quack)
That's a hen
Not a duck, you nitwit!
I've been quite unduly
Well and truly lumbered
But I'm never gonna get, never gonna get
Never never never gonna get, never gonna get
Never never never gonna get lumbered again!
Never gonna get, never gonna get
Never never never gonna get, never gonna get
Never never never gonna get lumbered again!
I've been lumbered!
