Brand New Dance

Get up Everybody on the dance floor, come on That means you too, Chris, haha Well, it's Friday night, no date for the prom Just got caught jackin' off by your mom Suspended from school for settin' off the alarm Kim Jong keep screamin' he gon' drop the bomb But anyway, every day is the same old shit Room lookin' like a tornado hit it Try to explain, your parents, they don't get it Time to hit you with a funky dope rhythm Let it roll, if you ready, we gon' start the show Everybody in the world, all across the globe You can feel it in your head down to your toes Dance until you're wheelchair bound, here we go Yeah, horseback, little do-si-do Little bit of soul mixed with some rodeo Everybody in the world's gonna laugh to this Shit, I'll probably end up crippled after this, come on Clap your hands and stomp your feet Everybody join together Can you feel the funky beat? Everywhere you see people laughing and Dancing in the street On the count of three, everybody do The Christopher Reeves One, two, three, follow me Superman, Batman, Spider-Man Slipped, fell, landed in a garbage can Shit, hell, damn it, I can hardly stand But I get it crackin' like no one in the party can Give me a beat, I'll show you all a brand-new dance All I need is a stretcher and an ambulance Now stand back, kids, don't try this at home Chi-boom, kick-boom, ooh, ah-oh It's a brand-new craze and it's sweepin' the nation Anything else is a cheap imitation Just make sure that you videotape it You can only do it once 'fore the people go apeshit It's a crowd favorite, a party pleaser It's better than shake of a grand mal seizure So next time that you see grandma, tease her And roll up with a fresh set of wheels all greased up Clap your hands and stomp your feet Everybody join together Can you feel the funky beat? Everywhere you see people laughing and Dancing in the street On the count of three, everybody do The Christopher Reeves One, two, three, follow me If your arms, legs, feet, and your hands are numb You've fallen and you can't get up It's a brand-new dance, this is my Chris anthem I'm givin' Chris Reeves his chrysanthemums I'ma have everybody jumpin' to this Caitlyn Jenner in the front row pumpin' her fists With a simple little twist and a flick of the wrist A little snap of the neck and a slip of the disc You just pull up a chair and grab a seat And clap your hands and stomp your feet Or stomp your hands and clap your feet Flop around 'til you lookin' like a slab of meat You put your left foot back, your right in front Tip your head back, let it touch your butt 'Til you feel a lil' pop, like what the fuck? Motherfuck, fuck a duck, what the fuck? I'm stuck So, party people, are you with me? What's the deal? If you real, grab your chair up by the wheel If you wanna feel just like the Man of Steel Windmillin' on a million banana peels, come on Clap your hands and stomp your feet Everybody join together Can you feel the funky beat? Everywhere you see people laughing and Dancing in the street On the count of three, everybody do The Christopher Reeves One, two, three, follow me (whoo) Good morning, Eminem or Marshall, as others have informed me Christopher Reeves here You had better not talk behind my back Or I will kick your ass the minute I'm out of this chair Watch yourself, Marshall I'm watching you Ah! Holy shit