Slow Burn

It begins with a dark glowing ember Something black burning its way out of me Searing the flesh Pain is the only thing I feel, scars all I see Oh no the fires burning my insides again What can I do to silence my desire tonight? Flames consuming reason leaving only ashes left You will catch me regretting my decision I can't keep telling myself what I want to hear I can't just close my eyes I know that it's killing me And it's poisoning the best in me What I see, I don't want to believe So let me tell you more, tell you more About the lies I lead That is how I chose to douse the flames in gasoline Broken teeth replace blackout memories in my head Wreckage from the past haunts me, shakes me to the bone I know it's over but I can't go home tonight But after this I feel as empty as the night before Feel the pain and yet I'm still begging for more Masochistic, nihilistic, urging backward thought My life's a mess and I can't find a way to fix it I can't keep telling myself what I want to hear I can't just close my eyes (my eyes, my eyes, my fucking eyes) I know that it's killing me And it's poisoning the best in me What I see, I don't want to believe So let me tell you more, tell you more About the lies I lead Calling, calling out The darkest reaches of my soul are riddled with self doubt Crawling, crawling out My will to fight will more than suffice when others would lay down It's only as dark as you make it I know that it's killing me And it's poisoning the best in me What I see, I don't want to believe So let me tell you more, tell you more About the lies I lead