It's a Privilege to Pee

Bobby! Bobby, reason with the woman I'm a little short this morning He's my Pa, Ms. Pennywise Can't he come in for free? Just this once? Get your head out of the clouds, Bobby Strong No one gets in for free Every morning you all come here And every morning some of you got reasons why ya ain't gonna pay And I'm here to tell ya, ya is gonna pay! In the name of God, Penny What difference could it make? What difference?! "Times are hard" "Our cash is tight" "You've got no right" I've heard it all before Just this once Is once too much Cause once they've once-d They'll want to once once more I run the only toilet In this part of town, you see So, if you've got to go You've got to go through me It's a privilege to pee Water's worth its weight In gold these days No more bathrooms Like in olden days You come here and pay a fee For the privilege to pee Twenty years we've had the drought And our reservoirs have all dried up I take my baths now in a coffee cup I boil what's left of it for tea And it's a privilege to pee The politicians in their wisdom saw That there should be a law The politicians taxed the toilets And made illegal Public urination and defecation So, come and give your coins to me Write your name here in the record book The authorities will want to look If you've been regular with me If you've paid the proper fee For the privilege to pee But Ms. Pennywise- I said no buts, Bobby You're a sweet looking boy And I likes to keep you around But this main ain't comin' in without payin' Not this time! I can't wait much longer, Bobby There's no tellin' what I might do! You think you've got some kind of right? (Kind of right, kind of right!) You think you'll come in here and go for free? (Snag a freebie!) The only thing you'll get is "no" for free! (Negatory!) I'm a business gal, you see (business gal you see!) I sell the privilege to pee! (It's a privilege to pee) The good Lord made us so we'd piss each day Until we piss away The good Lord made sure That what goes in men Must soon come out again So you're no different then From lowly me But, Ms. Pennywise- That's enough, Bobby And I think I'll charge you twice (No need to jeopardize your position) Or better yet, have you arrested (I'm through with all this, you see) Since you prefer the law gets tested (Scrapin' cash three times a day) And in Urinetown you'll see (Crazy with the nitrates half the time) Why it's dumb to fight with me It's no way to live, I tells ya No way to live For the privilege to pee! Ah! Ah! Ah!